What People Wish They Could Say To Their Pet That They’d Understand

A Twitter user sparked thought and had a lot of people responding when she asked last week what one thing they wish they could say to their pet that they’d understand. British comedian Avery Edison’s exact question was: “If you could say one sentence to your pet and know they would understand it, what would you say?” Her answer for what she’d say to her cat was that she’d never do anything to hurt her and that she’ll always be safe. Some of the responses on Twitter included:

• “If I move you off my lap when you’ve just gotten comfy it’s because I really need to pee, not because I don’t want you there.”
• “I love you as much as I love anything in this world but please for the love of god don’t bite the baby”
• I wish I could tell him to stop farting in my face when we’re on the couch. Just point your butthole in a different direction bubsy.
• “Hugs and high fives are not violent acts, and you need to stop screaming every time any two humans make physical contact in front of you, you beautiful idiot.”
• “I promise I will always come back home.”
• “Stop eating mud, dipsh*t”